New homily guidance can only lead to call for more cardboard priests

The revelation of a new directory from Archbishop Arthur Roche regarding homilies will surely bring forward the demand once again for more cardboard clergy.

The questions raised in the directory such as “what is the homily? what kind of attention does it deserve? and where do we find its contents?” must go through many people’s minds every week as they sit agog in the pews.

The cardboard clergy seem well suited to deliver satisfaction -

“The cardboard Priest is invaluable to hard-pressed clergy who need a

holiday. It is life-sized and comes in progressive, middle-of-the-road and

the Tridentine models. It is especially effective when stood behind the

lectern. Field trials have shown that when a cardboard Priest was

installed without the congregation knowing, 40% of those later

questioned had noticed no difference, while 25% said there had been a

considerable improvement,” say the producers. “Soon we hope to have available a cardboard Bishop which can be placed in the diocese while the real bishop is away in home. Trials models have been installed for same time in the Bishops Conference without being detected.”

The cardboard cut out could no doubt find useful employ in other areas of life as well?